Challengers’ dynamics

I glanced out the window, unsure now what to say
The fresh green leaves moved so sanft
Beyond them a bright blue expanse.
Inside the small cool room, the silence
was caught, wobbling
Like in the jug’s water next to me.
Surely someone needs to say something or
cackle nervously to break the sick-bag silence.

But that never came. So I said something
so bland
and afterwards I thought:

Why keep testing me?
I’ve been tested all my life,
So I’ll never know what else.